- Time
in the Superman Booth
- By Travelling One
-
-
- Summary: If Daniel and Jack could change their pasts, would
they? Only time can tell.
- Email: travelling_one@yahoo.ca
- Web:http://www.travellingone.com
- Related Episodes: COTG; Stargate the Movie
- Season: Any
- Disclaimer: The theme and main characters have been
borrowed from the Stargate SG-1 tv series, and are copyright
property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp,
Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I
Prod. Ltd. This story has been written for entertainment
purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended.
- June/03
-
-
-
- That couldn't be right.
-
- It just wasn't possible.
-
- As Daniel stared at the indisputable evidence on his
computer screen, solid and clear in front of his eyes now that
his research was nearly complete, there in black and white with
a few images pulled up from his own photographic meanderings
within this bizarre world of alienisms and wisdoms, he knew the
only way to deny the evidence was to admit that his
translations were completely wrong.
-
- Which he knew they weren't, due neither to arrogance nor
overconfidence but to the fact that they weren't so hard,
really, once the main categories and correlations had been
figured out. And while the challenge had continued sporadically
throughout the previous three months, moments grasped between
missions and deadlines and late-night coffee binges, there was
no question that he had finally come up with the complete,
entire decoding of this language. The translations he'd done so
far had provided him with both fascinating insights and
unexpected answers. The results were plain as the computer
screen before him.
-
- That had been an innocently strange-looking contraption,
that cubicle brought back from P2K 101, it's inner workings a
lot harder to interpret than its planet's near namesake in
introductory physics, according to Sam. It almost looked like a
telephone booth, and Jack's comment about removing Superman's
home base had not gone unappreciated by SG1's archaeologist.
Only, Superman had not come out, but Daniel had gone
in
-
- _____ P2K 101 _____
-
-
.."We can't take any of this stuff back with us,
Carter. It would take moving equipment and a hell of a lot of
space in the gateroom."
-
- "But sir, look at this room! If this was a meeting place,
as Daniel suggested, then why is all this equipment in
here?"
-
- "Carter, they probably congregated here Saturday nights to
watch the big game."
-
- "Jack, I think this was the seat of the government. Besides
the grandeur of this building, there seem to be all sorts of
files on these
leaves," what else might you call a series
of hundreds of thousands of tissue- paper-thin leaflets
inscribed with continuous symbols? While the material looked
delicate, it barely even folded when manipulated, bouncing back
to retain its original shape.
-
- "This cubicle appears to be hollow inside." Teal'c had
wandered to the largest object, having by now completed his
walk around its perimeter. "It is indeed meant to be
entered."
-
- "Confessional booth?"
-
- Daniel raised his eyebrows. To relieve politicians of their
sins? Right. Daniel peeked through the doorway - or
non-existent fourth wall - and stepped inside.
-
- The cubicle was barely larger than a phone booth, but the
interior had two narrow walls of small, projecting controls and
upraised symbols, while one wall was smooth, gray, and
completely blank. The fourth, of course, was empty space.
Daniel gazed around at the relief panels, aware of Sam looking
over his shoulder and blocking the light from behind.
-
- "Do you know what any of this is, Daniel?" she asked,
nodding towards the symbols covering the mid portions of the
surface areas.
-
- "Other than a Braille telephone directory, I have no
idea."
-
- "Graffiti?" Jack quipped.
-
- "Whose artists commanded a high price, no doubt," Daniel
replied straight-faced, running his fingers gently along the
raised writings. "Whatever it is, Jack
we can't just
leave it here."
-
- While Jack's near response was to reiterate the
impracticability of lugging this thing home somehow, in the
back of his mind that niggling impulse told him not to
disagree. There was something about this that begged to be
studied by the likes of Daniel Jackson, strangest archaeologist
on Earth, and Samantha Carter, best astrophysicist in the
entire galaxy. Hell, even the Asgard came calling for her
services. "Okay, Daniel. I'll recommend a team come back for
it. Any other toys you kids think we might need?"
-
- There had been some other curious objects, so SG1 marked a
few more items for pickup, with other rooms revealing bits of
smaller equipment. Eventually it had all been claimed and
retrieved, most of it now idly sitting in the lower storage
rooms collecting cobwebs. The scientific teams had been forced
to put the items on the back burner after weeks of futile
investigation, while some of the smaller pieces had been
delivered to Area 51.
-
- Now, after three months of inconsistent but intense study
and interpretive work and completion of about sixty percent of
all the leaflets he had discovered, Daniel stared wide-eyed and
gaping at his latest results.
-
- _____
-
- His fingers trembled nervously on the keyboard as he tried
to bring his thoughts back from where they kept wandering. This
was not logically possible; how could the planet have been
ruled this way? It was inconceivable. SG1 knew it was negligent
to change the past to alter the future, yet here was a society,
a government, that had been doing exactly that. And they had
done so successfully
although somewhere along the line
had it perhaps backfired, leading them to a place SG1 had not
been able to find? Where had these inhabitants gone? Had this
machine led to their eventual downfall?
-
- Daniel rolled his chair back and stood up, leaning his
hands on his desk and staring again at the computer screen. The
evidence was straightforward, undeniable, and unless this
society was given to perpetrating massive hoaxes, SG1 had just
unearthed the most potentially enlightening, destructive,
hopeful, frightening bit of technological machinery that could
fall into the hands of fallible humans. How could a government
possibly have ruled their world using this contraption?
It just wasn't feasible. It contradicted everything
Earth knew about physics, everything Sam had cautioned them
about altering the past, that whole Grandfather Paradox
thing
but that was exactly what these people had been
playing with, aiming for, and had mastered
changing the
past, altering the future, not only once but as often as need
be.
-
- If that blank wall really was a screen, and these
people really did view all possibilities before making
decisions based on how the future would look, then this society
had achieved not only an advanced state of technological
development but also a moral one.
-
- Daniel reread his notes for the tenth time. These leaders
had witnessed the future effects of all decisions they would
ever make, almost as though they were visiting an oracle. But
what was even more overwhelming was that if in fact things did
not seem to turn out well for their people
if, somewhere
along the line something had gone wrong, they would view
past decisions of their governmental representatives, of their
rulers, decide what had to be adjusted, and go back in time
to fix it. Suddenly, poof! Their lives would be
different, better. And most of the populace would never
even have known, going about their lives oblivious to or
perhaps even unaffected by the adjustments in time access.
Nothing in this world was set in stone, so to speak
or
set in history.
-
- Yet who was to say if a decision was a poor one? How far
into the future did they need to go before trying to reassess
or redo future history?
-
- The answer to that was here somewhere. Everywhere,
probably; Daniel could hardly wait to translate all those other
leaves even though it would probably take him two more
months.
-
- But what was definitely clear so far was that every step of
their way had been monitored, each major decision reviewed
beforehand, and if found to lead to unacceptable consequences,
their leaders would go back and redo some part of the plan, a
word, an agreement, a treaty. Everything could be changed;
nothing in their lives, in their history, was permanent.
Nothing. It was a wonder how they'd managed to get on with
their lives at all. But in all fairness, their society had been
at peace for millennia, from what Daniel had already
deciphered, and this machine had been in use for longer than
all of Earth's recorded history.
-
- What Earth could have done with equipment like that, Daniel
thought. If one could only see beforehand what results
political decisions would have; if one could look back after
the fact and change the events leading up to plagues, manmade
environmental disasters, wars
but who would be put in
charge? Whose decisions would have counted? What if it had been
Hitler in control of this thing, or
-
- How irresponsible it would have been for a single
individual to create history. This culture had likely had a
major delegation deciding what decisions to implement after
having viewed the potential results. Or
perhaps they
didn't, and that was what had destroyed them. If they
had been destroyed. Maybe they had just decided to move on.
That information would no doubt be somewhere amongst all these
pages.
-
- The politicians, or leaders, would definitely have to have
been honourable men. They would have commanded great willpower
in restraining themselves from using this technology for
personal use or profit, employing it for only the benefit of
all humankind on their planet. They had been dedicated servants
of their land, qualified and selfless.
-
- Daniel wondered if he could have been so trustworthy, in
their shoes.
-
- He sat down, rereading some of the information on his
monitor and pressing 'print'. How this could possibly work he
had no idea; other than performing the task itself, the inner
workings of the device would have to be studied by Sam.
Probably no harder to understand - nor easier - than Stargates
and wormholes that could dematerialize a body and transport it
thousands of light years in five seconds.
-
- But the execution itself, the calibrations, were nearly as
simple as dialling up a planet. A child could do it. Locate
your own world in space using similar calculations as for gate
addresses, let the machine find its moment in time - something
to do with entering the present position of the homeworld's
sun, the planet's magnetic field, and longitude and latitude of
the exact location of the machine at present - calibrate the
amount of leeway one needed to go to the past or future, then
step right up and enjoy the show.
-
- Daniel sat back and closed his eyes. What he would give to
be able to change some of the events of his past. Not that he
would, that Grandfather Paradox and all. Although
how presumptuous to suggest - to even consider - that
history would change by anything he, Daniel Jackson, could do.
How arrogant a thought. He could probably change any event in
his life and affect nothing as a result. Nothing important,
anyway.
-
- So, given the opportunity
what would he
consider?
-
- Simple. He would save his parents.
-
- Daniel stared at the open books on his desk. He could
save his parents, with this one machine.
-
- Of course, he couldn't. Wouldn't. Couldn't risk it.
-
- But, he could view it
just watch, for a few
minutes, what his life might have been. Watch, then cancel it
all out. No harm done. A few moments of pure fantasy, like
going to the theatre. An altered autobiography for the
emotionally impaired.
-
- And once rooted, Daniel could not push the thought from his
mind. The temptation was too enticing. At his fingertips, the
opportunity to witness a normal life for himself, for just a
few minutes
the stuff of dreams, his dreams for the past
quarter century.
-
- The machine was down in storage, and he knew he would have
no rest nor peace of mind until he had given it a try. Call it
testing an artifact, scientific investigation. After all, that
was his job, call it what you will.
-
- As he hesitantly stood, wondering just what it was he was
about to do, trying a potentially potent alien mechanism
masquerading as a time repair machine, Daniel ripped off a
piece of notepaper. Pausing for several moments, he hastily
scribbled a message to anyone who might need to find this. "The
booth from P2K 101 is a time machine of sorts. I'm downstairs
testing it out." Just in case. In case
something went
wrong. If he didn't come back in a few hours, someone would
certainly come looking for him, likely a member of SG1, someone
he could trust. If anything happened to him, poor Sam would
have to figure it out. He folded the note and slid it inside
his closed journal; he didn't want anyone to come looking
without reason. Let him be gone for too long, however, and
they'd search his office for clues. They'd find this if need
be. They'd find him.
-
- _____
-
- The ride down in the elevator nearly altered his plans. Too
much time to think; too much edginess and second-guessing.
Years of caution and self-protection began putting up defenses
against what should perhaps be left alone after all this time,
all this personal healing having been over and done with, and
more than once Daniel put his finger on the buttons to stop his
downward direction.
-
- But the buttons were never pushed, and Daniel found himself
on the level of the storage room in question, found his legs
taking him automatically forward. Not against his will, for his
subconscious desire to know had taken over completely, and he
was at the mercy of his own inner mind.
-
- Sliding his access card through the slot and pushing open
the door, Daniel stepped hesitantly into the dark room,
flicking on the light switch. There were boxes, along with
tagged items from 101, and there, shoved against one wall, was
the Superman Booth, found to have been constructed of
naquadah and various alloys. He sneezed once from the
dust.
-
- Hesitantly taking a few forward steps, Daniel peeked in
through its single open side, took a deep breath, imperceptibly
gave his head a shake, and stepped in.
-
- In front of him was the solitary gray wall of the screen;
beside him, two wall sets of controls. He knew what it was all
for now; the images displayed on his monitor were etched onto
his brain and he was confident that the printouts would prove
unnecessary. He had already worked this all out in his office,
detail by vivid detail.
-
- He pressed the seven coordinates of Earth in relation to
P2K 101: the galaxy, the solar system, the planet. With
trembling fingers he input the information that would calibrate
Earth's present time and desired distance into the past;
automatically the access modulators would seek and calculate
the date to the millionth of a second, or better.
-
- Symbols flashed in too rapid succession across the gray
wall for Daniel to grasp any of it, as his pounding heart
threatened to overtake them at any moment. He was well aware
that this could be the most foolish experiment he'd ever
initiated.
-
- But if this machine worked as he expected it to, if it
played out a life of his choosing in interactive viewing, then
no one would be affected by this but himself.
-
- As long as the machine behaved as he hoped it would.
-
- Now, as the symbols came to a halt and the screen faded
back to gray, Daniel took a deep breath, attempted to relax and
calm his heart and nerves, and waited.
-
- Nothing happened.
-
- Daniel stood staring, noticing his hands were trembling,
realizing it might have been wise to have used the restroom
before coming down here. Maybe this was such a bad
idea.
-
- But he couldn't stop now; he couldn't turn back.
Anticipation and adrenaline were giant motivators; more
determined than ever, he ran his fingers across the raised
symbols, wondering where he'd gone wrong. He could tell with
his eyes closed the glyphs that controlled the forward and
backward momentum of time, those that speeded and slowed its
progression. A piece of cake. Just, why wasn't it working?
-
- A thought pierced his brain just as his eyes noted the
small side panel that likely was for one's palm identification.
Of course; how else would his own personal position in time and
space be identifiable? As his fingers touched it seemingly of
their own accord, a slight glow accompanying electrical pulses
emanated from beneath, as Daniel wondered suddenly if this
contraption was really just a viewing device, or did it
actually transport the person into the intended time
period? His notes had suggested that that would occur
once changes to the past were verified and set, but he hadn't
read that this would happen just for viewing purposes. Would a
second person need to be present to press the controls and
retrieve the individual from wherever he had been sent? Should
Daniel have dragged Sam down here with him? His team never
would have allowed him to do this, had they known.
-
- But those thoughts came too late, and Daniel's fingers did
what they had been trying to do in the first place. Suddenly
the compartment blazed to life
and Daniel found himself
in a museum. He knew the place was New York, well aware that
the year was 1973, for he had input this data himself. It all
seemed so familiar to him now; his involuntary visit here with
the Gamekeeper had left a heavy weight on his shoulders. But
that time, he hadn't been able to do anything but watch his
parents be killed. This was
would be
different.
-
- Daniel sucked in a breath. He couldn't really be
here again, could he? This had to be more of that virtual
reality stuff. He hadn't really wanted to be here.
-
- With rising panic, his fingers stumbled around in the air
before him, and he felt an invisible barrier between himself
and those people raising that coverstone. Without thinking he
lifted his left hand from the identification panel, and the
room vanished. He was still in a control booth, once again in a
musty half-lit storage room.
-
- Closing his eyes he took a deep breath. God, that had been
too real. This wasn't like the theatre he'd ben
expecting, nor was it comparable to any TV screen he'd ever
seen.
-
- Daniel leaned his hands on the wall before him, his head
drooping forward and his eyes still closed, as he once again
gained control of his breaths and his heartbeat.
-
- This was definitely a stupid, foolish idea, yet one that he
had to carry through. This was his chance to know what his life
would have been like with a family, a chance that would never
fall in his lap again. He had to know.
-
- This time, aware that he could stop the whole process just
by removing his palm from the panel, Daniel again gently
pressed his hand down flat, and once more the museum flashed
into position around him. God
this must be like that
"Back to the Future" ride he'd heard about at Disneyworld;
"you would swear you were really there," he'd been
told.
-
- And as the coverstone balanced above his parents' heads, he
gathered his wits and moved in determination to change this
little bit of history.
-
- So
how, exactly, did one affect this program?
-
- Step in, said the instructions on the leaflets, and do what
should have been done. Say what should have been said.
-
- Daniel cleared his throat. "Claire
let's get out from
underneath this thing," he tried to get his father to say. But
nothing happened. The coverstone hovered.
-
- "Get out of there mom, dad!" His shout was automatic, and
the voice came out of the mouth of the eight-year-old boy
standing by the sidelines watching. The boy was ignored, the
coverstone fell, and the screams
-
- "Oh, god!" Daniel cried, and swiftly pulled his hand up as
if stung. The room vanished, leaving nothing but a
many-millennia machine surrounding him. Daniel realized his
cheeks were wet, and brushed a hand across his face.
-
- He had to get out of there. He had to sit down.
-
- Rushing from the booth, Daniel caught sight of old cartons
piled around the walls of the storage room. Sitting heavily on
one, he held his head, leaning elbows on his knees.
-
- Obviously he could only control the actions and words of
himself in time. He had no control over his mother or
father.
-
- Minutes passed, as Daniel again gained control. This wasn't
over. He was learning; he would not retreat to his office or
his home without seeing this through, now that he knew what he
was up against. This was an incredible device, when used
properly.
-
- Taking some slow breaths and sighing, he wiped his forehead
free of sweat and his cheeks free of tears, then stood to once
again enter the booth. On second thought, he dragged the heavy
carton in as well; it was likely he would be needing to sit
down sometime soon.
-
- And the game began again.
-
- But it was no game; this was Daniel's life, or it could
have been, and he was determined to get to know it.
-
- This time, however, he turned the clocks back to the wee
hours of the morning of the accident. This time, he found
himself - the child he had been - asleep in bed.
-
- Daniel took a deep breath. This time, he had to make it
work. "Mommy! Daddy!" he screamed, and the child Daniel sat up
in bed as his parents dashed into the small room.
-
- "Danny! What is it? What's wrong?" Daniel watched his
mother sit down on the bed, holding young Daniel to her chest,
and the pain that was his heart stabbed with its pulsating
beats. Daniel knew again that his face was wet, but he was
frozen and couldn't move.
-
- "Honey, what's wrong?" she asked again as dad looked
on.
-
- Daniel realized he had to speak, had to do the talking for
child Daniel. For the child himself would not know, would not
be able to complete this "mission" on his own, for this hadn't
actually happened. Daniel was still learning, experimenting
with himself as the time played out in a magical booth over a
quarter century later.
-
- "I, um, I had a dream, mommy! I dreamt
I dreamt you
and daddy got hurt under that coverstone you're putting up
tomorrow. The chain broke and you both
you both
died."
-
- "Oh sweetie, that won't happen. It was only a bad
dream."
-
- Shit, no. Believe me, mom. Please, I have to make you
believe me.
-
- "Mommy, no! It was real!" the child was looking frantically
from his mother to his father, actions being given life in
Daniel's own thoughts and being realized in this place, this
place back in virtual time
-
- "Danny! It isn't real," his father cut in. "You know
that."
-
- "Please, please, please daddy! Please, mommy. Please don't
stand under that stone when they're lifting it! Please?" the
wide begging eyes were filling with tears, mimicking Daniel's
own.
-
- "I don't know if we'll go under it Danny. Maybe just for a
minute, okay? Just to make sure it's adjusted properly."
-
- "Daddy! No!"
-
- "Look, Daniel..."
-
- "How does he know about the coverstone?" Claire looked
imploringly at her husband, stopping him in mid sentence. "It's
okay, sweetie. We'll stay clear of it while Jake's putting it
in place if it'll make you feel better."
-
- The tension in Daniel's body eased, and his face relaxed.
"Yes," the little voice whispered.
-
- "Okay then hon. Go back to sleep, okay?" Daniel nodded, and
lay back on his pillow.
-
- Daniel's right-handed fingers searched out the time-forward
control. He knew them all with his eyes closed.
-
- Only, keeping his eyes closed is what he should have done,
for "fast forwarding" with himself in the center of the action
was dizzying and nauseating, and Daniel felt his stomach jolt
and his balance waver as he let go and sat rapidly on the box
behind him, eyes closed and taking deep breaths. Only after his
head had stopped spinning did he realize that the program was
still advancing forward. Daniel leaped up, ignoring the
multi-levelled images swirling in extreme motion around him,
and stopped the progression of time.
-
- Resetting the controls to the day of the museum accident,
Daniel hesitated for a few seconds before pressing his palm
down once more. He would find out, this time, if it were really
possible to affect time and history. He would either watch his
parents cheat death, or this would be his final try.
-
- And there he was, watching the coverstone being attached to
the hooks. As it was being lifted his father stepped forward,
Claire putting a restraining hand on his arm, indicating
silently the terrified look on their son's face.
-
- "It's swinging, Jake!" Suddenly the coverstone crashed to
the ground, it's reverberating thud causing Daniel to
gasp.
-
- Her expression stunned as she looked upon the shaking child
who had uncannily saved their lives, Claire Jackson sat down
flat on the floor. Looking over at her son, she silently held
out her arms, and the child ran into the embrace, cradled in
her lap oblivious to the human action beginning to again flow
around them. Daniel watched, something inside finally finding
peace.
-
- Drinking in the scene for many minutes, knowing the comfort
of mother and child as they grasped each other tightly, Daniel
felt the hollowness dwelling inside him, the emptiness that had
been his for over twenty-five years. For just a few more
moments, his mother would love him. For a few moments more, he
would be a normal boy.
-
- Finally, Daniel stopped the imagery, and he was again in a
cold, desolate storage room, aching in his heart and far too
alone, silent tears making their way to his chin.
-
- Impatiently wiping them away he forwarded the time period,
took a deep breath, and began again.
-
- This was a bedroom, and the child that he had been was
lying on the bed in his pajamas, his mother leaning against the
headboard with a book in her hand. She was reading as Daniel's
eyes closed, the boy grown by a couple of years. The book was
in Hebrew, and Daniel leaned contentedly against his mother's
left arm.
-
- As the ten-year-old fell asleep, Daniel watched as his
mother kissed his forehead, laying the book on the nightstand.
"Sleep well," she whispered. "We have a long day's journey
tomorrow."
-
- Daniel watched the boy sleep long after his mother had left
the room.
-
- This would have been his life.
-
- _____
-
- Scene after emotional scene had left Daniel with a feeling
of imagined nostalgia, a deep painful aching for a past that
had never been his. Yet the hollowness and longing had also
imparted a sense of calmness, of satisfaction and acceptance.
The love he had experienced during the past few hours had
seemed real; this was the life he had always dreamt of, had
always imagined, and for this afternoon at least, it had been
his.
-
- And Daniel knew that a single plunge of the "set and
accept" lever would change history and make it real
forever.
-
- Forever.
-
- He would have grown up with family, never alone, nor would
he be alone ever again.
-
- He could make this happen; could set that child's dream to
become the reality. Would Daniel find himself as a distressed
eight-year-old waking up from a nightmare, or would time
continue from the present, with his parents still alive? Would
it really be the big deal Sam had insinuated, if he changed
this one major event in his own life? Would it really be so
terrible, so selfish?
-
- How presumptuous of him to think that changing his life in
this way might ever have any impact on anything important in
history. Nothing would have changed but his life for the
better; his grandfather would not have had to feel guilty for
rejecting him; his foster parents would have taken in some
other young child instead. What would he be hurting if he were
to make this life permanent? It might even end up changing
things for the better.
-
- Just one push of the accept lever
-
- Daniel sighed.
-
- The temptation was there, but wisdom spoke against the
deed. His future is what would change, that's what.
-
- Maybe.
-
- Maybe not.
-
- Maybe not enough to damage anything
-
- And Daniel set the speed for the date of his dismal lecture
that sealed his fate with the Stargate program.
-
- But he did not find himself onstage in front of a jeering
audience; instead, he recognized the western desert of Egypt
around him, his vantage point from shoulder-deep in an
excavation pit, his father not more than four meters away. As
Daniel looked around, he recognized his mother in the field,
deep in discussion. So
he was working hand in hand with
his parents, and Daniel smiled.
-
- Would he never have been part of the Stargate program?
Would there have been a Stargate program?
-
- Of course; it had already been nearly in place, although
things may have gone a little slower without him. Probably a
good thing, at that.
-
- But the next time span had Daniel puzzled. For
here
he was now, at the SGC, his aging father at his side, shaking
Catherine's hand. Barbara Shore was heading off down the
hallway, but Dr. Gary Meyers was nowhere to be seen.
-
- "I'm pleased you decided to join us, Doctor Jackson. Doctor
Jacksons," she added, looking over at Daniel. "Tell me,
Dr. Jackson, do you find yourself contradicting your father
very often, with those wild theories of yours?"
-
- Daniel blushed, focussing on the gray concrete floor of the
corridor. "Sometimes."
-
- "Not so often," the older man denied. "Daniel's theories
are just ...a little more unorthodox than mine. He's young and
enthusiastic," the elder archaeologist seemed to add
apologetically, unaware that Catherine's main interest lay in
the younger man's unorthodox ideas. No matter; the woman
hoped that the two of them working together might turn out to
be the best thing for the program, and just what the project
may have needed all along. None of the other Egyptologists had
as yet made enough progress to be useful.
-
- "What I still don't understand, however, is why you wanted
me
us
here."
-
- "That will be clear in a few minutes, Dr. Jackson,"
Catherine answered. "Come with me." She led the way down the
corridors that were all too familiar to Daniel by now, although
his subdued counterpart from the past was frowning in
subconscious disappointment. Whatever he had been expecting
from this facility had not materialized. Not yet,
anyway, Daniel thought. But just wait 'til you see that
big round thing... which would be hidden under a coverstone
at the moment.
-
- Daniel barely noticed as the trio made their way into the
gateroom or as Catherine explained what she required from the
two archaeologists. No, his thoughts were on the realization
that his father at least tolerated his beliefs; his family
would not have scorned him.
-
- And what of Nick? Did they believe in Nick too? Was the
elder archaeologist locked up in a mental institution, or had
his family saved him from that dishonour and humiliation? This
"change" in Daniel's own historical familial past was looking
better and better.
-
- Daniel looked around the facility for familiar faces. Once
again remembering that he could manipulate his own self in this
virtual reality, he caused himself to pull Catherine aside.
"Dr. Langford
I need to ask you something, but I don't
want you to ask why I'm asking."
-
- The woman looked at him with curiosity. "That sounds
intriguing, Dr. Jackson."
-
- "Please... call me Daniel." Daniel's smile was brief. "Is
Maj... Captain Samantha Carter here?"
-
- "Captain Carter? How do you know her?" Catherine
queried.
-
- "Dr. Langford
" Daniel threw her a shy glance. She
wasn't supposed to ask.
-
- Catherine smiled conspiratorially. "Daniel? Okay, so you're
hoping to meet Samantha Carter." Her eyes twinkled as she noted
the slight frustration in Daniel's eyes. "To answer your
question, she has been involved with our project for a
while now, but she works out of the Pentagon."
-
- Of course. Sam would only have arrived here a year later
when Jack's second team was formed. "What about Jack
O'Neill?"
-
- Catherine's features turned wary. "How do you know Colonel
O'Neill?"
-
- "Dr. Langford, please. Is he here? We
we met
once."
-
- "And why would you think he'd be here at Cheyenne
Mountain?" her eyes narrowed. "Who have you been talking to,
Daniel?"
-
- Caught in his own game, Daniel realized he'd better be
careful. Sighing, he didn't know how to continue. "So he's not
here?"
-
- Catherine studied the man whose journal articles had
intrigued her and whose language skills awed her, much like his
esteemed father, a well-respected archaeologist in his field
whose latest theories had stirred some reactions as well. There
were one or two other archaeologists saying the Sphinx was much
older than first believed, perhaps not even having been created
by the Egyptians at all, but the younger man standing here
before her was the first to apply his theory to the pyramids.
"He was here for only a few days. I don't know how well you
knew him, Daniel. But I'll tell you that Colonel O'Neill
committed suicide several months ago, just a few weeks after
his son died."
-
- Daniel inhaled sharply, and raised his palm from the
panel.
-
- For moments he just stood, gazing at a blank gray wall in
an alien phone booth. Surely his presence, his words, could not
have had such an effect on Jack as to keep the man alive?
-
- Surely
-
- And Daniel's idyllic life was slapped back at him as a
dream, only a dream. He could not reset his entire childhood
existence; he had known that from the start. Any other hopes
had been momentary selfishness, deluding his psyche into
believing that things could be different. All just a dream in
an emotional afternoon. The lump in his throat wouldn't swallow
down.
-
- Yet still, Daniel could not bring himself to move, could
not leave this machine that held his happiness in its
hands
or rather, in its alien mechanisms.
-
- Could he not save his parents and Jack as well? All he had
to do was join the SGC in time for that first mission to
Abydos
right?
-
- Nervously fumbling with the controls, Daniel set the time
to rewind to the very date that Catherine had contacted him in
this reality, the day that had changed his life forever
once again.
-
- And for the second time, Daniel discovered himself on the
dig in Egypt.
-
- He focussed on his counterpart, and had him announce to his
father, "I have to make an important call, dad. I'll be back
later." And Daniel went to find a driver to take him to the
nearest town.
-
- _____
-
- "Dr. Langford? This is Dr. Jackson. I'm an
Egyptologist
"
-
- "Oh yes, Dr, Jackson. I'm familiar with your work."
-
- Well, that was probably his father, but that was okay
too
-
- "Uh, Dr, Langford, I'd like to meet with you to discuss
some things
"
-
- "Why would you want to meet with me, Dr.
Jackson?"
-
- Come on, Catherine
this is where you're supposed
to want to meet with me
maybe his theories
hadn't been made public yet? How far back in time would he have
to go, to change things the way he needed them? Forget the
Grandfather effect, this one was clearly Dominoes.
-
- "Um
I heard you might need some translation work
done." Couldn't mention the Stargate; he wasn't supposed to
know of that yet. And that's not what they were calling it
either; what was it... the 'Door to Heaven'?
-
- "I see. I might get back to you in a few days, Dr. Jackson.
I'm on my way to meet with another Egyptologist - you might
know him - Dr. Steven Rayner? about an extremely important
matter."
-
- Daniel froze. Steven would have been asked by Catherine to
decipher the Stargate glyphs? But he hadn't believed in
aliens
which was irrelevant, for had Steven interpreted
the symbols, he would have been a believer soon enough.
Catherine had seemingly searched around, and had found Steven
to be the best there was
in North America at the time,
beginning work on his soon-to-be best-selling book.
-
- Daniel progressed the time to the moment he had found both
himself and his father at the SGC. Again, the two were
preparing to be debriefed by Catherine. Nothing had changed in
that respect. So, that meant Steven had not been able to
decipher the glyphs, yet he must have been at the SGC for a
while otherwise Catherine would have called upon the Jacksons
sooner. Either way, Jack was dead.
-
- Daniel stopped the program. He'd seen enough.
-
- Resting on the box in the little compartment, Daniel
realized how stiff he had become, how his neck was aching and
that persistent headache was making its way towards his
eyebrows. He'd been in here over four hours.
-
- So.
-
- Without changing one thing after another after another
after another, Daniel realized too much time had already passed
for him to correct his childhood miseries. The leaders of P2K
101 must have been highly organized, devoting their lives to
keeping control of their history day by day. Maybe those in
charge had died, and no one had been trained to carry on.
Perhaps the younger generation had not wanted the
responsibility.
-
- Daniel was no longer aware of the time passing, nor of how
long he continued to sit there, on an uncomfortable crate in a
cramped cubicle. Too many thoughts pressed in on him, hopes and
dreams and the knowledge that he should never have opened this
Pandora's box of unfulfilled memories. Still, he knew that now
he might be able to put his parents to rest, knowing the most
probable outcomes of their having survived. A family for a
friend; good thing he would never really have to make that
choice.
-
- And still Daniel could not bring himself to leave. There
was one more thing he had to do, one more time period he had to
revisit. For maybe, just maybe
maybe he could save his
life with Sha're.
-
- Once again Daniel stood, able to automatically configure
the settings that would bring him to another planet, face to
face with a life and a love that now seemed so distant in the
past, a happiness nearly forgotten. Those dreams had been
reality for the better part of a year, and for that he would be
eternally grateful.
-
- He nervously stepped into perfection on Abydos.
-
- He had set the controls for several minutes before Jack's
team arrived, hoping to spend time watching Sha're. Watching
Sha're with himself, although he could neither touch nor hold
her. And then, all too soon, Jack was there, ignoring him, and
Ferretti was offering him tissues.
-
- He'd nearly forgotten all that. In the hours and days that
had followed, Jack's reaction towards him hadn't been
important.
-
- Daniel continued to watch, savouring the moments with new
friends and old, and when the time came to retreat to the
temple and show Jack and Sam the inscribed walls, this time he
insisted that Sha're come along.
-
- They spent what seemed like hours in the temple, he and
Captain Dr. Carter batting around scientific theories, Jack and
Sha're conversing about what had happened on Abydos that past
year.
-
- Finally, Daniel took a deep breath as the small group made
their way back to the pyramid
-
-
and found Jaffa everywhere along the route, grabbing
screaming women and children, and Sha're took off in a
run.
-
- "No!" Sha're cried, "Let her go!" as she made
a dash to aid one of her clan caught in the grip of a strong
Jaffa warrior.
-
- "Sha're!" Daniel cried out, but he was too late to stop her
before she, too, became a frantic captive of the silverheaded
guards that had not found what they were looking for in the
pyramid itself.
-
- Daniel lifted his left hand, inhaling as though he'd been
running. Swinging time backwards, he put them all back inside
the temple, determined to wait this out. While it appalled him
to realize that other Abydonians would be captured, the
alternative was allowing Teal'c to abscond with Sha're, and
that was just not acceptable.
-
- And there they were, gazing at the ancient walls of a
forbidden temple, Sha're just a little impatient to get back to
the festivities.
-
- "Daniel, we must return to the gathering. They are all
waiting for us."
-
- Yes, they are waiting, Sha're, but not our friends.
Those await who will hurt you, take you away and you will never
be you again.
-
- "No, Sha're. We must stay here a while longer
I must,
I need to show Dr. Carter more of this, um, writing."
-
- "We can come back tomorrow, Daniel."
-
- "No, Jack! We
we have more to do. Now." They
had to stay. They had to wait for the Jaffa to leave.
-
- And so he began his discourse on the past culture, the
forbidden writings, the Goa'uld activity on Abydos, and he
dragged it out, hoping that Sam would not get fed up with him
right then and there.
-
- Until their peacefulness was interrupted, and a troupe of
Jaffa stood in the doorway.
-
- Sam gasped as she was grabbed from behind. Daniel spun
around to see Jack raise his weapon, and the staff blast that
caught the colonel sucked Daniel's breath from his body. It
happened so quickly his brain barely had time to register, but
seeing Sha're in the forceful grip of another Jaffa caused
Daniel to shout and lunge, and the blast threw his lifeless
body hard against the wall.
-
- Daniel could only watch helplessly from a wannabe Superman
phone booth as Sam and Sha're were dragged away, the two
lifeless men splattered across the floor.
-
- And Daniel shut his eyes as the scene went gray, indicating
the loss of life of the man pressing his palm onto the
identification panel.
-
- _____
-
- Daniel remained for uncounted minutes trying to cope with a
worse scenario than the one he'd been forced to live. Still
standing with eyes shut in a mystery box deep in the heart of a
guarded mountain, he couldn't admit that there was no better
life for himself in any direction, in any historical time
frame. Maybe his alternate self on some other dimension was
living happily, but how would it have come about? What could he
do to go to sleep knowing that somehow there had been a chance
for him to be happy, to make a decision that would not have
destroyed Sha're or his teammates?
-
- All he could think of was to not unbury the Stargate on
Abydos at all.
-
- But how long could he force himself to do that? He knew
he'd find the temple and the sets of symbols all over the
walls; eventually his curiosity would have led him to
experiment, no matter how long he stalled.
-
- How long could he hold off?
-
- Once again, Daniel convinced himself to reset the
coordinates, this time to the day that he decided to begin
unburying the Abydos gate. Something will go wrong, he
told his other self. Something terrible will happen if you
do this. He planted the dread in the mind of his
counterpart that would keep the Goa'uld away from Sha're
forever. And keep him off the Stargate program.
-
- And he knew right away how wrong that decision would have
been. He needed to be on the program; he knew that Earth in
those alternate realities had been in trouble when he hadn't
been there.
-
- Still he kept his palm pressed on the naquadah rectangle,
oblivious now to the vibrating luster of electrical current,
forwarded the time, and sucked in his breath.
-
- For beside him in his canvas home was a pregnant Sha're,
and he was combing her hair.
-
- Daniel watched the scene for many long moments, listening
to the voice he'd been close to forgetting, speaking in her
mother tongue. He listened to the laughter and recognized the
loving look in his eyes. Playing in the back of his mind was
the knowledge that he would have to check on Earth and see how
it was faring, but he didn't know if that was possible with
this Daniel still on Abydos. Reluctantly, he forwarded time
once more.
-
- There was a festival, and food and music were abundant.
Daniel found himself in the middle of a group of young men and
women whom he recognized as those he'd been teaching to read,
and the sense of pleasure and joy filled the atmosphere.
Listening to the discussions around him, Daniel realized this
festival was a yearly event, marking the day of their freedom
from Ra.
-
- As that time frame's Daniel made his way to a constructed
podium sheltered from the sun by a canvas awning, urged on by
his many followers, a child of about four ran up and grabbed
him around the knee. Daniel heard himself whisper a name, as he
lifted the little girl and hugged her to him. Together, they
stepped up to the platform and waited for the crowd's voices to
settle.
-
- The speech was lost on Daniel's ears; all he could hear was
Tashon, the name of his daughter echoing from his lips.
-
- He had a daughter.
-
- Daniel removed his hand, the images disappearing. He had
found his happiness; though he could never retain it, this was
a memory he could sleep with tonight.
-
- Whether the machine was addictive or the thought of
happiness was, Daniel could not stop. He had to see more, had
to hold onto what his life might have been. Sadistic, he
realized, to be so eagerly watching a child who had never
been born. And while that thought sobered him, he wanted
only one more vision. One more, and then he would stop.
-
- Forwarded in time now, his daughter had grown. She looked
to be somewhere around eight or nine, and was the image of her
mother. So beautiful, with the long flowing hair and the
twinkle in her eye as she sat by her mother's side under a
large open canopy, as Daniel taught her to read. He barely
noticed the dozen or so other students, some children, some
adults, for the mesmerizing wonder that was his family was
incentive enough, and the knowledge that his life was perfect
was intoxicating.
-
- But the sunlight dimmed as suddenly as the speckle-faced
lizards disappear into the sand, and all gazes turned upwards.
From all around, shouts could be heard, panicked cries as the
villagers realized that Daniel may not have saved them from Ra
after all. For there in the sky above them was a huge ship, and
it appeared to be landing on their pyramid.
-
- "Oh God," Daniel whispered, not knowing whether it was his
own voice or his Other's. He grabbed his daughter and told them
all to run, to hide; told them not to come out until that ship
had gone. His eyes searched around for Sha're, and found her
running towards him, panic on her face. As she reached him, he
could tell that her eyes begged for her to be wrong; pleaded
for him to tell her that these were friends, but all he could
say was, "Let's get to the temple!" He held Sha're and he held
his daughter, and they ran.
-
- Death gliders swarmed overhead, blasting the sand to
bits.
-
- Jaffa were everywhere, following some unknown ruler, some
false god, and suddenly Daniel could sense their anger, their
hatred at having been overthrown by mere peasants on a poor
desert planet so many years earlier.
-
- "Go!" he thrust Tashon into Sha're's arms, knowing the
child was too big for her to carry but he had no other choice.
He had to divert the approaching group long enough for his wife
and daughter to make it to the temple.
-
- "No, Daniel!" Sha're's eyes were full of fear, but there
was no time to argue.
-
- "Go!" he said again, forcefully but it was not an order. It
was a plea, and as Daniel turned to face the oncoming enemy,
Sha're put Tashon down, grabbed hold of the youngster's hand,
and began to run.
-
- They never made it.
-
- The first staff blast caught him in the leg, and before the
next one hit his back, Daniel saw the two flashes only moments
before his wife and daughter were buried in the sand.
-
- "NO!" Daniel heard a voice cry, and knew this time
it was his own.
-
- And then he shut down the machine.
-
- _____
-
- He could have been transported by rings in moments or he
could have taken days to arrive, but when Daniel finally
reached the solitude of his office he was uncertain as to how
he'd gotten there. Nothing had registered on his way up and if
he'd passed anyone along the route he couldn't remember.
-
- "Where the hell have you been?"
-
- "What?" Daniel looked up sharply at the unwelcome intrusion
into his thoughts. Why was Jack sitting in his office?
"Why?"
-
- "You weren't signed out. I paged you twice."
-
- Daniel stared blankly. "You did?"
-
- "Daniel, I've been looking for you for three hours. And
unless you took in an encyclopedia, no one's in the john for
that long." Unless they'd been crying. Forget the
encyclopedia and forget the unwanted jokes; Daniel's appearance
did not go unnoticed by his superior.
-
- As Jack gazed at Daniel's exhausted demeanor, the red
watery eyes and weary posture, his attitude softened. "Sorry,
Daniel. What's going on?"
-
- "Nothing. I'm fine."
-
- "Daniel, spill it." Jack settled back into the chair, legs
outstretched and hands clasped behind his head. "I'm not
leaving until you do." Uncomfortable as this is.
-
- Daniel sighed and sat down at his desk. It took a few
moments before he looked directly at his team leader, but it
was obvious that Jack wasn't planning on moving. "I was in the
Superman booth."
-
- Jack was taken aback. That he had not been
expecting. As his expression changed from surprise to annoyance
to incomprehension, he retorted, "What the hell for?"
-
- "It's a time machine."
-
- "Well there's a highway you don't want to play
on."
-
- Daniel sighed loudly, "I spent the afternoon with my
parents."
-
- Oh crap and holy shit. Torn between yelling and
sarcasm, Jack was at a loss for words. He was too aware that
this was Daniel's core, his heart and soul and likely the most
important thing in his friend's world.
-
- When the interrogation didn't come, no chastisements or
criticisms or scolding, Daniel spoke quietly. "We can't change
things."
-
- "I know that."
-
- "I saw Sha're." I had a daughter. And I know how you
felt when you lost your son.
-
- "Crap, Daniel. How could you do this to yourself?" Not to
mention how damn dangerous it was to be fooling around with
alien equipment, alone at that.
-
- "I had to see what my life would've been, Jack. I had to
know." Daniel gazed into artificial memories. "I had to see
what it would've been like to have a family."
-
- "It's dangerous, Daniel."
-
- "I know. We have to take it back." That wasn't what Jack
meant, exactly, but Daniel was convinced they couldn't let that
thing fall into the wrong hands. Or anyone's. "It tempted me,
Jack." But he wouldn't tell his friend exactly what had caused
him to abandon the temptation. "I almost wanted to leave things
that way."
-
- "You wouldn't have. You have too much integrity."
-
- Daniel just shrugged. If Jack hadn't been a friend
who knows.
-
- "Show me."
-
- Daniel's head snapped up. "What?"
-
- "I want to try it."
-
- No, Jack. He knew what Jack would try to change; did
Daniel have the right to stop him? How hypocritical that would
be after he himself had spent an entire afternoon doing exactly
the same.
-
- "It hurts," he said softly.
-
- "Understood going in." Jack's eyes never left Daniel's. He
was determined; he needed to see his son grow up.
-
- _____
-
- As Daniel set the controls, he placed a hand on Jack's
back. "You can't control anyone but yourself. You can't stop
him from playing with the gun." Jack nodded slightly. "And
keeping your palm on the panel here keeps the images playing;
don't get overwhelmed and forget you've got control. Remember
you're always in control, Jack. Everything looks pretty real."
As Jack nodded once more, Daniel added, "I'll be here if you
need help." If you forget to get yourself out. Then
Daniel took a step backwards out of the small cubicle and sat
down to wait on a carton across the room. We're both
fools, he thought.
-
- Then Jack was in his bedroom, gun in hand, placing it in a
box which he made sure to lock, a place where curious young
fingers could never reach. The key he taped to the top of a
drawer, never to be seen if someone was actually searching. If
he had to waste time getting it out should someone break and
enter their home, he would just have to take that chance.
-
- He raised his hand to stop the images, as Daniel had
instructed, before advancing through time. His heart rate
increased and his breathing slowed, as Jack watched himself
play ball with his son
a son of thirteen years old. Grass
stains on his knees, a shoelace untied... and that was a
T-shirt Jack had never seen before. This was not just some
fantasy conjured up by a willing and desperate imagination. It
surrounded him; he could nearly reach out and touch the grass,
himself, his son. Jack could not take his eyes off the scene,
could not stop watching, could not retreat to a darkened
storage room; he could not give up witnessing this cheated
life.
-
- The life of ballgames and birthdays, report cards and
Christmases. Gifts and arguments and hugs and scolding and
holidays by the lake, teaching Charlie to fish. He saw it all,
and how much time was passing was irrelevant.
-
- What would it hurt to keep things this way? Who would be
affected by his son growing up healthy, happy, and full of
life? Sara would still be with him; all would be for the
better. There would be no more pain for any of them. Only good
things could come of this
right?
-
- So as Jack watched the scenes playing out in surround sound
and surreal visual reality, he understood Daniel's temptation.
He knew what it was like to want for a lifetime, then have
everything placed in front of you on a platter. He knew what it
would be like to say 'no, take that away'.
-
- It hurt.
-
- Did it have to be taken away at all?
-
- Yes. Something was wrong; why didn't any of these scenarios
seem to include his friends from the SGC?
-
- He reversed time slightly, this had to be some point during
the first year of his involvement with SG1.
-
- But he wasn't there; he was in camouflage out in some
nameless rainy field, guiding a troupe of young Air Force
cadets.
-
- After a moment's confused reflection, Jack realized that
for some reason he would never have been, it seemed, a part of
the Stargate program. He puzzled over these findings. What
could have happened to cause this?
-
- Okay
yes. He knew what it was.
-
- He'd been depressed; the military had come calling hoping
for a soldier, a leader, willing to undertake a suicide
mission. They would not have come to him this time.
-
- "Daniel, come here."
-
- Daniel heard the voice, the request, from where he sat, and
he moved to stand in the doorway, seeing Jack watching the
screen before him. To experience the full virtual effects
apparently one had to be standing inside.
-
- Jack glanced over at his friend, now appearing to stand in
the wet field with him. "Take me to the present," he requested
softly, and Daniel complied.
-
- Daniel set the controls, then stood only for a moment
watching Jack, before giving his friend privacy.
-
- But there was nothing there. The screen remained gray.
-
- Did that mean he was dead?
-
- Jack closed his eyes and regressed time, and then he
rewound it some more.
-
- This time, he found himself within Cheyenne Mountain, the
activity around him chaotic. Orders were being barked out as
sirens blared, red lights flashed and personnel were running in
every direction. But he was on the upper levels, he realized;
nowhere near the gateroom. "What's going on?" Jack had himself
ask.
-
- "They're starting to attack Colorado! ...The ships,
Sir?
Isn't that why you're here, Colonel?" was the
frenzied answer as the airman saluted and impatiently waited to
be dismissed.
-
- "We're being attacked?" Jack repeated dimly.
-
- The airman frowned in surprise. "Sir? They started
attacking the West Coast two days ago! Haven't you been
sorry, Sir." The colonel waved him off and the young man dashed
away.
-
- Jack rushed to the elevators, but couldn't get past the
eleventh floor. "Where are they coming from?" He asked the
first official-looking person he encountered.
-
- "We have no idea who they are or where they're from. What
did they call you in for, Colonel?"
-
- "To figure out how to deal with this, I think," Jack
ad-libbed. "Have you people been using the Stargate?"
-
- "That contraption that archaeologist figured out a few
years ago? We haven't used it since they went through to that
place with the bomb... but how did you know about that,
Colonel?"
-
- Jack kept his reaction intact. "Where's Dr. Jackson
now?"
-
- "Dr. Jackson?"
-
- "That archaeologist!"
-
- The man frowned. "Colonel, that whole team never returned.
What's this about? You think this is connected?"
-
- Damn it.
-
- Whoever had replaced him had set off the bomb before Daniel
had had a chance to figure out the return coordinates. Or maybe
Daniel had not convinced that CO to reverse his decision at
all. Perhaps they'd never even had a chance to use those rings
and get the bomb off the surface of the planet. The explosion
would have reacted with the naquadah in the soil, triggering a
massive chain reaction and destroying everything, including any
spaceships parked on top of that pyramid.
-
- But why weren't the Goa'uld coming through the gate?
-
- "Where's the Stargate now?"
-
- "In a block of concrete on level 28, Colonel. You can't go
down; the room's sealed and airtight."
-
- So Daniel was dead, there was no Teal'c here on Earth, and
now the whole planet was under attack as it had been on that
alternate universe Daniel had accidentally gated to. Ah
Daniel had never found it in this time zone. How the hell could
Jack's not joining the Stargate program have had such an
impact?
-
- Okay, this was salvageable. Jack could demand to be put on
the team that went through to Abydos.
-
- "Daniel?" Jack stopped the momentum of passing time. And
Daniel was there, one more time, at his side, and for a moment
the world was right again. "Set this back to the day before you
deciphered the Stargate glyphs."
-
- Now Jack found himself in his home, facing his wife and son
at the dinner table.
-
- "I'm almost packed, dad," Charlie looked up at him with
eager eyes, and Jack's intake of breath was heard in the
storage room.
-
- Daniel looked up from the words he'd been absent-mindedly
contemplating on the crate in front of him, keep
refrigerated, and wondered if his friend needed help. He'd
give him another moment
.
-
- "Packed for what?" Jack asked.
-
- Charlie's eyes were wide and hurt.
-
- "Jack
" Sara's voice and eyes were questioning.
"Daddy's teasing, honey. He's looking forward to New Mexico as
much as you are."
-
- New Mexico. Yes, Charlie had always wanted to see those
caves at Carlsbad, ever since he'd been seven and had seen the
3D pictures in his Viewmaster. "Sara
?" Jack nodded
towards the hallway, and they both got up to leave. Jack paused
just outside the kitchen door. "Tomorrow?"
-
- "Yes, Jack, tomorrow. What's with you, anyway?"
-
- "I have to go to Cheyenne Mountain tomorrow."
-
- "Jack
you promised Charlie. You said you wouldn't do
this any more, let work get in the way. He's missed you."
-
- So, he had just come back from ...somewhere. Apparently
having a son hadn't changed him. But he had to go to the SGC,
had to go to Abydos in two days. Had to stop a bomb from
destroying Abydos and Daniel.
-
- "Can we postpone it?"
-
- "Until when? The day after tomorrow? Next year? Maybe until
Charlie has children of his own?"
-
- Not the day after tomorrow, he'd be on another world. Then
another, and another, and he'd keep on disappointing his son
and being unable to tell his wife where he was going or what he
was doing
or why.
-
- "Jack
I want you to think about what we talked about.
Seriously, okay? Please retire, Jack. If not for us than for
Charlie."
-
- Retire. He couldn't do that. He had to be on the Stargate
program. Had to be there with Daniel, and Carter, and Teal'c.
He had to save the world
again and again. He couldn't let
someone blow up Abydos
Skaara
Sha're
Daniel.
Couldn't let Apophis blow up Earth sometime in the future.
-
- But if this experience would have been true, if he had
really saved Charlie's life, then Sara had eventually convinced
him to retire, or he'd at least taken assignments closer to
home. He'd already seen the ballgames and the bike rides and
the holidays fishing at the lake.
-
- Jack forwarded the time.
-
- He was in New Mexico with his son and wife. Why hadn't he
made himself go to Cheyenne Mountain?
-
- Back up, rewind.
-
- There.
-
- "I'm sorry, Colonel. You're not right for this job. Colonel
Matheson is not married, and we don't know what's out
there."
-
- Oh, but I do, General West. "I'm willing to take the
chance, General. It's important to me to do this. I know what
you're planning
and I'm fine with it."
-
- West stared for a full minute before responding. "The team
that goes through that gate, with Dr. Jackson's promise of
getting them home, will be led by Colonel Matheson, Colonel
O'Neill. Dismissed."
-
- Jack froze, before remembering to lift his palm. He
realized that all the men who had been allowed on that first
mission, other than himself and there was a different reason
for that, were either single or divorced
without close
family members, without children
including Daniel. There
was only one way for him to go to Abydos, and that was in a
suicidal state of mind. But Charlie had to have died for that
to happen.
-
- Jack became aware of Daniel standing behind him in the open
space of the missing wall, and he turned. With a shrug, Jack
muttered, "We can't change anything."
-
- "We have to return this," Daniel studied his friend's
sorrow.
-
- "We will."
-
- "We can't tell them what it is."
-
- "Hammond has to know or he won't send it back."
-
- "He'll do the right thing." At least they had a commander
they could trust.
-
- "You know, I guess we were destined to work together." Jack
eyed Daniel, squinting in thought. "You and me." Not such a
bad deal.
-
- "To save the world?" Daniel queried quietly. Or to keep
each other company in foolish endeavors?
-
- "Sure. Clark Kent and Jimmy Olsen."
-
- "Which of us is Clark?"
-
- "That would be me."
-
- "I've got the glasses."
-
- "I'm in the phone booth."
-
- ___
-
- "There are no happy endings."
-
- "Yes there are," Jack contradicted, as he sat on the edge
of the desk studying Daniel. It had been a long hard day;
longer for Daniel, of course, who'd had to wait so patiently
for him in that cold room on a storage crate, but a stressful
emotional time for the both of them. They had given up doubts
long in the making, and it was not so easy to adjust to a truth
one had always known in one's soul but denied in the
heart.
-
- "Okay, there are. Only, we're not in them."
-
- Jack paused, tapping his fingers on his knee. He knew
Daniel needed more than platitudes. "You're not alone in this
world, Daniel. You have us. We may not be what you're looking
for, but you are part of the SGC family. You're
SG1's
um,... brother, I guess." Geez, think you could
you be any more reassuring?
-
- Daniel caught himself in a near-smile. "Brother. That
sounds good."
-
- "We could make it blood brothers. I have my
pocketknife," Jack teased cheerily.
-
- Daniel raised his eyebrows. "Uh, no, I don't think that'll
be necessary, Jack."
-
- "Whatever." Jack shrugged, feigning nonchalance.
-
- Brothers. Any time, anywhere
anywhere in the world,
having someone to rely on. It was a nice thought, even if
Daniel didn't really believe it. Out of sight, out of mind;
he'd had enough "friends" over the years to know. Friends never
stayed brothers.
-
- "So, when I'm seventy, you'll be there for me?" Daniel
glanced up from the nearly illegible notes he'd been
scribbling. "Of course, you'll be... what, eighty-three?"
-
- "Ah, but look at it this way, Daniel. When I'm
eighty-three, I'll have a youngster of seventy to take care of
me." As Daniel chuckled, Jack continued. "Your wife and kids
will love me."
-
- Daniel blinked. "They'll have no choice." Wife and kids.
Jack had just given him another gift, insinuating that really
was a possibility. "So
what happens now, Jack? I mean,
picture this, if you will. We're on some planet, you want to do
things one way and I disagree; we have a big argument and don't
want to talk to each other." Are we still brothers then,
Jack?
-
- "Easy. We wrestle."
-
- "We wrestle?"
-
- "It's what brothers do."
-
- This time Daniel couldn't conceal the smile.
"Ten-year-olds."
-
- Jack grinned as he headed for the door. "You know, Daniel,
we may disagree at times but never for a second do I ever stop
respecting you or your opinions." Seeing Daniel open-mouthed
and at a loss for words had nearly made that disclosure
worthwhile. "It's late, Daniel. Want to grab a burger?"
-
- "Yeah, in a bit."
-
- "See you soon then. Meet me on eleven in an hour."
-
- "See you then, Jack." Daniel watched Jack stroll idly
towards the corridor, pausing to look both ways as if watching
for oncoming cars or not really knowing where he was heading.
He looked lost, almost.
-
- "Wait
Jack?" Daniel called out.
-
- The older man turned and poked his head back into the
doorway. "Don't change your mind, Daniel. I'm hungry."
-
- "No
well, yes, I changed my mind. Can I borrow your
pocketknife?"
-
- Jack frowned, narrowing his eyes. His knife? Daniel wasn't
really intending to
ick,
then he'd
have to. Hell. Blood brothers.
-
- What the hell. It had been a rough afternoon, and the
reassurance wasn't only for Daniel.
-
- He handed over his pocketknife to Daniel's outstretched
hand.
-
- The younger man flinched as he pierced his thumb, a trickle
of blood flowing downwards. Hesitantly, shyly, Daniel held out
the knife for Jack. He knew the other man had been kidding,
that he'd never really meant to do this. Would Jack humour him?
Another moment of truth, but he had to know, just like
everything else in this roller coaster day.
-
- SG1 brothers. Jack hadn't been kidding about that, though,
right? Daniel tried to keep his emotions concealed as he held
the tiny knife out to the close friend that had almost
sworn to become his family, and he waited.
-
- Looking into Daniel's earnest eyes, Jack saw a raw soul
trying too hard not to admit he needed this. Jack realized at
the same time that he, too, needed a friend he could count on.
And while this gesture would never change the fact that Daniel
was always ready and willing to be there for him anyway, it was
a symbolic representation they could both fall back on when
times got rough and shaky. Jack knew he valued Daniel's
friendship as much as Daniel did his. Their need for
reassurance was mutual.
-
- Daniel let out his breath quietly as Jack took the knife
and pierced his own thumb, his expression remaining stoic. As
he held up his tiny puncture, Daniel pressed his own onto
Jack's. "Ten-year-olds," Daniel muttered. "I thought only kids
did this sort of thing."
-
- "Adults are only kids grown big," Jack retorted, keeping
eye contact with his teammate and friend.
-
- Daniel smiled. "See you soon, Jack."
-
- Jack motioned with his left hand, a partial wave, a partial
acknowledgement, before backing out the door.
-
- Daniel sat back and stared at his thumb. Nothing would
really change, of course
but it was nice knowing that
someone at least cared enough to want him to think so. And
actually, a blood sister might be nice, too. And a blood Jaffa
might be really interesting. Not that any of that was
necessary, though; they'd all shed blood and been there for
each other when it most counted. And there was no machine in
this world that was ever going to change what they'd already
been through together, or the abundant amount of caring that
was already firmly established between them. Regrets never
paid; no one should redo the past nor should they want to.
Daniel realized he'd moved on long ago as had Jack and the
others; for now, all he could do was value the present and hope
it lasted.
-
- And the present was about to continue with a burger. No
small compensation, considering he'd have it with everything.
Including good company.
-
-
back home
-
-
- comments